Fiji in September!

I have managed a cheap direct flight from Hobart to Nadi online - Yippee! Air Pacific for a change. I am finding the Virgin Blue seats very narrow and had a bout of back pain last time I was coming back from Nadi to Sydney caused me to walk up and down the aisles for an hour or so.
I have become more adventurous recently in booking flights and accomodation online. I used Wotif.com for a week at Mana island in January which was great. I have used LastMinute.com to book four nights at the Quest appartments in Suva twice now. I used travel.com to book my flight to Fiji. Its all very interesting. I went to Air Pacific website and couldn't find a cheap deal, then through an online wholesaler I have done good. Its worth a try.
I told my brother that I can save him heaps next year if he wants a holiday on Castaway again - I can organise flights, accomodation,transfers, and a stay over night in Nadi - all online. Who needs a travel agent I say?
The only issue with booking online are the conditions for change. If you book with an airline, you have the opportunity to change with specific fares, with online bookings with wotif, last minute, Asia Hotels, Hotels.com etc there are charges to making a change. However, I saved myself money this trip, but more than that I saved time. I am leaving on Friday September 5th on an early flight to Sydney, and flying out at one o'clock on an afternoon flight to Nadi. Usually with Virgin Blue I have to fly to Sydney the night before, stay overnight somewhere, spend $100 in taxi fares, and leave for Nadi the next day; whereas this flight just leaves me sitting in Sydney airport reading a book or a magazine..... I am very happy.
I have also managed a free flight on frequent flyers - something I have never done before.
I have also organised 4 nights at the Quest Appartments in Suva, where Chita and I will behave like an old married couple. We go shopping for meals at the supermarket, have dinner together and watch tv or go to the movies...domestic bliss.
Its all turning out better than I had hoped.
I have had friends through this blogsite who have gone to Fiji and met Chita. He is always there with a smile, and happy to talk. I miss hanging out with him. I used to walk up to the shop every morning for a coffee, a chat, and breakfast if I was lucky. He makes great Fijian pancakes.
I love the heat, I miss that tropical vista which is always so beautiful and appealing. I miss being warm to my bones. Winter in Tassie is cold, and my body doesn't like it, as my physio can attest.
Chita decided to text me yesterday morning at 5.30 am and wake me up.... he knows I am not a morning person, whereas he is. He opens his eyes, leaps out of bed, checks on the weather for the day, has a shower immediately and then starts making coffee (one good thing I have taught him) while I usually roll over... I was lying in the dark waiting for the sun to rise, while he was sitting on the deck, full sunlight on a warm sunny day in Fiji, asking me questions about our holiday. He needs a day off, he told me - a sign of a lot of physically demanding hard work.
He has been extending the shop for the last couple of weeks. He is adding a room with a bathroom which I have been dreaming of, for about a couple of years.... so I can't wait to see his handywork. Last time I rang there were discussions about the toilet and shower - we want to minimise impact on the reef.
I rang him last night to tell him what I have organised for our short week in Fiji together, and he was lying in the hammock, with his bible, looking for strength. I am very proud of his dedication, determination and persistence.
A long distance relationship tests all your fears. I know he loves me. I know I love him. I used to wonder if he would be tempted by other women,but now I don't go there. Our relationship is built on trust.
I have seen the way some Fijian men behave, and I don't like it. Treat others the way you wish to be treated is my mantra. I think that working on creating a line of communication which bridged both our cultures, and gave us a way to talk to each other openly and honestly was the only way we were going to overcome continual cultural misunderstandings,and perceived bad behaviour from two cultures. I ignore village law, and he sometimes behaves like an Fijian male who does what he likes.... to be railed in and reprimanded occasionally. Its not easy. I sometimes find it hard to be calm. He used to walk off on me and come back four hours later, now the turn around is around 1-3 minutes. He still walks off, but calms himself down, and comes back in to talk.
I have had friends dying lately; I have had friends breaking up with their marriages and here we are dreaming of having a life together. It feels strange. I thought I would be married in my 20's it never happened. I could have married the first boy who asked me, but he has a bland palate and we would never have lasted. I could have married a Sicilian, but I would be living in a boring suburb of Milan, putting up with his awful family. Instead I am a grown up, wanting a life with a Fijian male, who is gentle, kind and loyal- something I could never have imagined...
But life is never dull for me. I face problems, most people don't, I am learning about another culture I knew little or nothing about. Its made me political. I was hoping the Rudd government would bring about serious changes to our migration policy but he has already excluded Fiji from the Pacific Seasonal workers scheme. I hate bureaucracy - six months to process a fiance visa!! Australia's reaction to the December coup 2006 was way out - it was not a violent coup. Considering how long we have been dealing with Fiji, you would think our goverment would understand the tribal nature influencing pacific governance and be a bit more tolerant. I am warming up to an article in one of the major papers on life in Fiji today.....

Good and Bad News!

I have been super optimistic lately, not fretting, not thinking negative thoughts. Chita has been up to Suva a few times to push his medical, x-ray and today his police clearance. It appears to be moving forward.
In my mind I had visualised his arrival as September/October and now I have a letter from the Department stating our visa will take 6 months so the interview date is, wait for it, the 9th of December 2008. Blimey. I knew it could take 4- 10 months so its exactly in between.
Part of me feels like going to Fiji and getting married, but that would upset the visa process and who knows how much longer we would have to wait....
I am philosophical about it, but I am also thinking, six months without seeing Chita. I don't think so. I have just forked out for an appartment, now have regular bills, and am trying to set up something for us here, and today I have been scrabbling around on the internet trying to find cheap fares from Hobart to Nadi and back. I have been working out my pay to see if I have enough money to go. Not really. Chita wants a holiday but no funds available.
Will he have the room on the shop built? Maybe, maybe not. A week at his mum's... will mean having to incorporate village festivities and responsibilities into our week and I don't want to.
Will wait for a miracle on wotif.com or lastminute.com.
Good news is that we have found a couple to look after the shop if Chita ever gets to Australia. An Italian friend of ours, who I had wanted to work with last year, has just lost her guest house - no lease, five years of renovation and maintenance and now the wily Indian owner wants to sell and she has no money to buy....
Business is very risky in Fiji.
Anyhow, I had discussed my wood fired oven idea- making our own bread, pizza and cakes and selling to passing traffic- and maybe it could just work. A contract is required I told Chita, and he agreed.
So much for us building a house in Fiji, working in Australia, travelling around Tassie together, and then further afield to Japan, where Chita lived off and on for three years, and back to Sicily for me.... in September 2009 would be nice.
Am applying for jobs, with a higher salary and more senior role to cope with this constant drain on my resources. At present I get to see my love, my partner, for 1-2 weeks every three months..... no wonder people give up... am I insane? am I enjoying this torture on some level? what am I getting out of it? not a lot at present....i know how African refugees feel. This is madness!
Our official letter requesting extra information was wrong - they had ticked the wrong boxes. I hope it is sent to Australia and processed here, otherwise with Fiji time, who knows how long it will take.... my patience is wearing thin...

How to know if a Fijian man is married?

I have been getting heaps of emails, and chatting to women in much the same predicament as myself. We have all been mesmerised by the lush green tropical setting of Fiji, blue lagoons and white waves crashing on the fringes. Then along comes a sweet, gentle, smiling Fijian who is just so friendly. Yep I fell for it too.
How do you know if they are single? married? available? The only way I found out was by going and living in Chita's bure for six weeks. Every night and day I was surrounded by Fijian men; I met his family and European friends and I just sort of worked it out that he is free. There is no one else in his life.
Spending three months of the year apart, makes it hard. I sometimes do think - maybe he could be with someone else- then I ring him up and he is at the cafe, or walking along the road, or sitting with friends on a hillside nearby. I have to trust him.
Fiji is close to Australia. That is the trap. You can actually contemplate coming back and developing a friendship - if it was Madagascar you'd think, 'Oh well, I've met a great guy but this is never going to work'.
Let me tell you now, its not easy. Its bloody hard work. I spend three months of the year on my own. We talk a lot by phone. We share our two lives over the phone, but we do not have a life together. I have tried to get a job in Fiji but I cannot live on $20,000. Applying for this fiance visa has been a hard journey. It took me three months just to put the documents together. Then I had to hand over a huge amount of cash to an immigration agent.... then sit and wait.... a month to the day of our initial application, Chita receives a call from the Immigration department in Suva to come for a medical, x-ray and to obtain a police clearance. He tried to wake me at 6.30 am but I was of course dreaming of other things. He waited two hours until I woke up and eventually found his message then off he went.
Its a big deal - getting involved with someone from another culture. In Fijian culture everyone knows how to respond to different situations; its not verbalised; its internalised. Its difficult to sometimes know if you are making a big blunder or not - those smiling faces will never give it away.
Is he married? The only way to find out is to ask his friends and family.
If you marry a Fijian, you marry a clan, and a village. I am about to pay $100 for transport for the body of chita's cousin's grandmother because no one else can pay. Each clan is given a responsibility and as I am the only one working and earning we have to contribute.... that's the Fijian way..... If you are loaded you probably won't mind, but if you are middle of the road like me, every cent counts. I am busy setting up a flat for Chita and I to live in when he gets here.
It could be soon! September/October I am hoping....
I have bought a charcoal grey couch today, two cube book shelves and now I am scouting around for a small flat screen tv..... after that I will be saving to take my boy on a road trip around the apple isle....
Are you ready for all this??
I wasn't, but now I am in it up to my neck, I just keep trying to move forward.
Moce.